Subway’s Jared, A Man With A Soul Darker Than Black Forest Ham

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Most of us have heard by now that ‘Jared Fogle’ from Subway is quite a sketchy dude. His home was recently raided on child pornography allegations and it has also come to light that Jared ran a black market porn lending library from his college dorm room while attending Indiana University.

The more we find out about this guy who won our hearts over all those years ago, the more we want to puke up every Subway sandwich we have ever consumed.

According to fellow Indiana University students that attended school with Jared, Jared ran a successful black market porn ring out of his dorm room. Selling movies for $1 a piece and it would appear that Jared had enough porn to go around the campus more than once.

According to a Best Week Ever exclusive from back in 2007, while at Indiana University, Jared ran a black market pornography rental service straight out of his dorm room. From Best Week Ever:

His porn collection was vast and extensive, and Fogle took his business pretty seriously. A video would run a patron a dollar a day (cheap!), and people would come from all over to take advantage of the deal. Needless to say, Jared had enough porn to keep his customers happy.

Jared was extremely over weight in college and he tied on with Subway after claiming he lost hundreds of pounds while consuming an all Subway diet.

Well my friends, it would appear now that Jared simply ate Subway everyday in college out of pure laziness. While Jared was sitting in his dorm, shelling out pornography like he was giving bread to starving children, a Subway store went in on the bottom floor of his dorm building. So, Jared simply ate what was right there, allowing him more time to focus on his business.


Selling porn is one thing, child pornography is another. What a sick, sick individual Jared is. It was refreshing to see that Subway Corp. cut all ties with the sandwich eating asshole.

Here are some individual’s reactions from Gawker to the news.

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