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One in five relationships now begins from an online connection. This could come via a dating website, app, or social media. You could also be lucky enough to have a matchmaking friend who sends your social media profile to a hot single.
Of course, not all potential relationships start online; meeting a new squeeze in the wine aisle of your local grocery store does sometimes happen. Yes, you might bump heads over a bottle of Chardonnay and decide he’s “the one”.
Whichever way you meet someone, it’s always wise to do some preliminary checking before you meet them or invite them to visit your family. Catfishing is a thing, sadly, and people are not always who they claim to be.
Social Media Research
Nobody is suggesting you stalk a potential date before meeting them. That would be creepy. But it doesn’t hurt to do some fact-checking.
Start with their social media profile. Assuming they haven’t locked down their profile (which is actually rather sensible), verify their relationship status, and see if what they’ve told you adds up. Check out their friends’ profiles too, to see if they look legit. Don’t just stick to Facebook. Continue your search on LinkedIn and other social sites.
Do a reverse image check to make sure your date hasn’t stolen their photo. It’s quite common for aspiring daters to ‘borrow’ a photo from a hot Insta-model to boost their matches. Google has a reverse image search tool, or you can try a site like tinyeye.com.
Use People Finder Sites
The next step is to cross-check any information your date gives you. For example, if they claim to live in a small town in Texas, run their name and any other information you have though a people search site. Any information held on public databases will show up, such as addresses, lawsuits, police records, etc. It’s a great way to validate a person before you meet.
Talk to Mutual Friends
Find out whether you have any mutual friends and message them to get the inside story. Knowing you have a few friends in common can offer some peace of mind.
Dates are Stalking You Too…
Researching a potential date works both ways. Remember, everything you post online is fair game to someone interested in you.
A report published in the Daily Mail highlights the risks we take when we post seemingly innocent photos on social media. The tale of a Japanese Instagrammer and her tenacious stalker should strike fear into the heart of any Millennial and Gen X social media blogger.
Popstar Ena Matsuoka posted photos on Instagram, as most of us do, but a stalker used tiny details in the photos to track her down in real life. He cross-referenced images with Street View and even used a reflection in her eyeball to work out where Matsuoka lived. He was later charged with stalking and sexual assault, after following the star home and attacking her.
Small things, like geolocation data and personal information added to social media posts, make it terrifyingly easy for miscreants to track us down.
Use your best judgment when researching a potential date. If anything doesn’t add up, make a note of it, but don’t take everything you read at face value. Men or women who have no digital footprint might just be private individuals and people who appear to be ‘players’ might not have met the right person yet.
