{"id":4763,"date":"2015-04-16T22:18:38","date_gmt":"2015-04-17T02:18:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/?p=4763"},"modified":"2023-08-01T13:45:30","modified_gmt":"2023-08-01T17:45:30","slug":"20-incredibly-funny-short-jokes-that-are-guaranteed-to-make-you-smile","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/20-incredibly-funny-short-jokes-that-are-guaranteed-to-make-you-smile\/","title":{"rendered":"20 Incredibly Funny Short Jokes That Are Guaranteed To Make You Smile"},"content":{"rendered":"

These 20 jokes are guaranteed to make you crack a smile! Share them with others<\/a><\/em> and brighten their day up a little, because laughter<\/a> is the best medicine!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Wether you are looking for jokes to tell your friends, funny jokes<\/a><\/strong> to tell a girl or funny jokes to text…you have come to the right place!<\/p>\n

RELATED<\/span> | 27 Of The Best Two Line Jokes Ever! <\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

1.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0 ”I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.”<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

2.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0”Dyslexic man walks into a bra”<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

3.<\/span><\/h1>\n

Doc, I can’t stop singing the ‘Green Green Grass of Home’. He said: ‘That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome’. ‘Is it common?’ I asked.\u00a0 ‘It’s not unusual’ he replied.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

4.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

5.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0 I went to buy some camouflage pants\u00a0the other day but I couldn’t find any.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

6.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0Teacher<\/span>: “Anyone who thinks they are\u00a0stupid may stand up!”<\/strong>
\n Nobody stands up<\/strong>
\n Teacher<\/span>: “I’m sure there are some stupid students over here!!”<\/strong>
\n Little Johnny stands up*<\/strong>
\n Teacher<\/span>: “Ohh, Johnny you think you’re stupid?”<\/strong>
\n Little Johnny<\/em><\/span>: “No… i just feel bad that you’re standing alone…”<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

Related | The Best Irish Joke Ever!<\/span><\/a> Priceless!<\/span><\/h1>\n
\n

7.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0Police<\/span>: Where do you live?<\/strong>
\n Me<\/em><\/span>: With my parents<\/strong>
\n Police<\/span>: Where do\u00a0your\u00a0parents live?<\/strong>
\n Me<\/em><\/span>: With me<\/strong>
\n Police<\/span>: Where do you\u00a0all live?<\/strong>
\n Me<\/em><\/span>: Together<\/strong>
\n Police<\/span>: Where is your\u00a0house?<\/strong>
\n Me<\/em><\/span>: Next to my neighbors house<\/strong>
\n Police<\/span>: Where is your neighbors house?<\/strong>
\n \u00a0 Me<\/span><\/em>: If i tell you, you wont believe me.<\/strong>
\n Police<\/span>: Tell me<\/strong>
\n Me<\/em><\/span>: Next to my house<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

8.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

Dad<\/span>: Say daddy!<\/strong>
\n Baby<\/em><\/span>: Mommy!<\/strong>
\n Dad<\/span>: Come on, say daddy!<\/strong>
\n Baby<\/em><\/span>: Mommy!<\/strong>
\n Dad<\/span>: F*ck , just say daddy!<\/strong>
\n Baby<\/em><\/span>: F*ck, Mommy!<\/strong>
\n Mom<\/span>: Honey, I’m home!<\/strong>
\n Baby<\/em><\/span>: F*ck!<\/strong>
\n Mom<\/span>: Who taught you that?<\/strong>
\n Baby<\/em><\/span>: Daddy!<\/strong>
\n Dad<\/span>: Son of a b*tch.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

9.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0Boy<\/span>: The principal is so dumb!<\/strong>
\n Girl<\/em><\/span>: Do you know who I am?<\/strong>
\n Boy<\/span>: No…<\/strong>
\n Girl<\/em><\/span>: I am the principal’s daughter!<\/strong>
\n Boy<\/span>: Do you know who I am?<\/strong>
\n Girl<\/em><\/span>: No…<\/strong>
\n Boy<\/span>: Good! *walks away*<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

10.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0<\/strong>\u00a0When people go underwater in scary movies, I like to hold my breath and see if I would have survived that situation.\u00a0I almost died in Finding Nemo.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Click Next For More Funny Jokes!<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

<\/p>\n

These 20 jokes are guaranteed to make you crack a smile! Share them with others<\/em> and brighten their day up a little, because laughter<\/a> is the best medicine!<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

11.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0\u00a020 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don’t let Kevin Bacon die!<\/strong><\/p>\n

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12.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0<\/strong>\u00a0When I see lovers’ names carved in a tree, I don’t think its cute. I just think it’s crazy how many people bring knives on a date.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

13.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Husband (watching a video<\/em>):<\/strong>
\n “Don’t do it! I swear you are going regret it for the rest of your life. Your’e dumb if you say it…! Don’t say yes.\u00a0No! Aw dang, he actually did it! What an idiot!<\/strong>
\n Wife: Honey, why are you so mad? What is it you are\u00a0watching?<\/strong>
\n Husband: Our wedding ceremony.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

14.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0Ever notice\u00a0how after an argument is all over, you start to think about more clever\u00a0awesome shit you could have said?<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

15.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0*Hot Girl’s Facebook Status*<\/strong>
\n “Bored<\/em>” –86 Likes<\/span> –54 Comments<\/span><\/strong>
\n *My status*<\/strong>
\n “Just got accepted into Harvard!” -0 Likes -1 Comment from Mom:”…Nerd”<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

16.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0Boyfriend<\/span>: You know you can be a real bitch.<\/strong>
\n Girlfriend<\/span><\/em>: I have been called worse.<\/strong>
\n Boyfriend<\/span>: Like what?<\/strong>
\n Girlfriend<\/span><\/em>: Your girlfriend!<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

17.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0Say, “Do I smell popcorn<\/em>?” right after you fart. So everybody takes a big whiff.<\/strong><\/p>\n

(Couples that fart together stay together….lol)<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

18.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

\u00a0Q<\/span>: Is Google a boy or girl?<\/strong>
\n A<\/span>: Obviously a girl because it wont let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas<\/strong><\/p>\n

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19.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

Election and Erection are spelled almost exactly the same. They both mean the same thing too. A dick rising to power.<\/strong><\/p>\n

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20.<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n

Daughter<\/span>: Mom, I’m pregnant!<\/strong>
\n Mom<\/span>: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches your vagina, say stop.<\/strong>
\n Daughter<\/span>: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.<\/strong><\/p>\n

(More Funny Text Messages)<\/a><\/h2>\n

\"beforeyougo\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Here are 10 facts I think we can conclude about you:<\/span><\/strong>
\nFact 1<\/strong>: You are reading this.
\nFact 2<\/strong>: You can’t say the letter ‘m’ without touching your lips.
\nFact 3<\/strong>: You just tried it.
\nFact 4<\/strong>: You’re smiling.
\nFact 6<\/strong>: You’re smiling or laughing again.
\nFact 7<\/strong>: You didn’t notice I missed fact 5.
\nFact 8<\/strong>: You just checked it.
\nFact <\/strong>9<\/strong>: You’re smiling again.
\nFact 10<\/strong>: You like this post<\/strong> and you\u00a0are thinking about who you are going to share it with\u00a0right now<\/strong><\/em><\/span>!\u00a0\ud83d\ude42<\/span><\/p>\n

Also check out | 25 Short Jokes That Are So Stupid…They Are Funny!<\/a><\/strong><\/h1>\n

Like<\/span>\u00a0\u272a<\/span> Share\u00a0<\/span>\u272a Be\u00a0Awesome<\/span><\/span><\/h1>\n
<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

These 20 jokes are guaranteed to make you crack a smile! Share them with others and brighten their day up a little, because laughter is the best medicine! Wether you are looking for jokes to tell your friends, funny jokes to tell a girl or funny jokes to text…you have come to the right place! RELATED | 27 Of The Best Two Line Jokes Ever! 1. \u00a0 ”I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.” 2. \u00a0”Dyslexic man walks into a bra” 3. Doc, I can’t stop singing the <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4765,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1,29,4],"tags":[129,1511,1512,896],"yst_prominent_words":[15779,27228,9371,27231,27230,27233,9382,27226,9540,9212,27225,9372,27232,27227,10839,27229,9077,9306,9771,9746],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4763"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4763"}],"version-history":[{"count":26,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4763\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":84612,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4763\/revisions\/84612"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4765"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4763"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4763"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4763"},{"taxonomy":"yst_prominent_words","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/awesomejelly.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/yst_prominent_words?post=4763"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}